A few things happened recently where the penny finally dropped for me.
I was talking with someone going through a tough time, they were asking me what to do. I said “Breathe”. They responded “What?”. I proceeded to explain as simple as it sounds try and slow your thoughts and focus on what’s happening now by just stopping…
And…
Breathing…
Slower.
A few days later redkite was asking what would you say to parent who was just diagnosed. My response was, Breathe.
It feels a little odd that something so simple helps so much, but it does, and it can be taken to the next level.
What? Breathing to the next level?
Yes.
But before half the readers disappear, just stick with me for a bit.
No, I’m not talking about hyperventilating. I’m talking about mindfulness meditation.
When I thought of meditation, I thought of a stereotypical vegan zen monk burning incense or hippies drinking kombucha, raking sand, balancing stones and sitting cross-legged under a tepee. (oops, there goes more of my readers). Sorry! I’m not meaning to offend, but none of that is me, and further to that I thought meditation was not aligned with my faith because I hadn’t seen it in church. Reality is I don’t need to be a monk or hippy, it’s not complicated, I don’t need a tepee, it’s mentioned multiple times in the bible AND you can stop, breathe, be aware and observe your thoughts anywhere.
How can something so simple be over complicated? Words!
As far as I can tell, these things describe the same thing: meditation, contemplation, reflection, sitting, breathing. Then add adjectives to it to make it sound different. Admittedly, some of these things are applied in different ways, but when you’re starting out it’s bloody confusing.
In marketing (and change management) they say you need to hear a message 5-7 times before acting. For me, because of the multitude of terms used and my preconceived perception (unconscious bias) I’ve been slow on the uptake of mindfulness. I swear I’ve been told about the same thing (different ways) 30+ times over the last 5-7 years. I’ve even been to groups and suggested others should try parts of the concept.
During this time of telling others to breathe, my “coach” was telling me to give mindfulness a crack (probably the 29th time I’d been told) as part of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy. Once again I thought about it but brushed it aside. A few days later I stumbled across a TED talk on taming your wandering mind. The penny dropped further, I read the associated article and it started to click. I mentioned the TED talk in a chat and a friend pointed me in the direction of the My Year Living Mindfully documentary and which led me to the a beginners guide to starting mindfulness blog post. Mind blown! Here was a guide to someone getting rid of the marketing fluff, simplifying things, giving mindfulness a red hot go and documenting it.
Fast forward a few weeks and where am I at?
- I’ve subscribed to the Headspace app and completed almost all the basics courses
- I make time (usually in the morning) to spend some time meditating
- I’ve encouraged the family to give it a go too
- I feel good, a lot less flustered and more calm (mostly)
- There’s been tough days - sometimes it’s REALLY REALLY HARD to just sit and breathe
- It’s not what I initially thought it would be like
- I’m not perfect - I still lose my marbles
- The more I learn, the more I learn there is to learn - I’m starting to see how different variants of meditation and mindfulness can be used, but the first step is, breathing.
Where to next?
I think I might do a Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction course, because it’s one thing to listen to apps and podcasts, but it’s another to get direction from a professional.
I’ll keep learning and looking at other resources and practicing mindfulness. Supposedly the more you do it the better it gets 🙂
If I knew what I knew now, where would I start?
- Have an open mind
- Read a beginners guide to starting mindfulness
- Decide when each day you will make 5 minutes to start
- Get an app that has a “getting started” or “beginners guide” (after much deliberation I chose Headspace because of the way it was structured and the male voice, but I did look into Calm, Smiling Mind, Insight timer, Ten Percent Happier. Try one, if you don’t like it try another, but just stick with one)
- Just Do It
This post is part of my How do you do it series click the tag below are see the intro post here.